Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Cheating the system
I was supposed to enter into my journal regularly, as you can probably tell, I failed to do so. So I cheated. I do have some moral reservations about this but I decided against telling my teacher the truth and just playing catch up. I wrote 3 weeks of journal entries in one night to make up for it. It made me feel good to write a little and get some stuff off my chest. I will post the highlights below
What a great weekend. It was a great opportunity to share good times with friends, especially because my time with these friends is limited. It was essentially a 48 hour party capped with 11 hours of driving on either end. My favorite thing to do on the weekend was to ask people what I should see on my tour of Lubbock, TX. The answer, there is nothing to see in Lubbock. It really helped enforce one of the two greatest decisions in my life, attending CU. The other was joining Theta Xi. As a soon to be graduating senior, I can really appreciate all that I have gained from my fraternity. The areas of focus in my mission statement are good times, family, friends, career, and personal growth.
Good times is an easy one, between all of the awesome activities and parties I have lived an entire standard college experience of good times every year. When I mention the list of things that I did at the end of the year it literally matches that of a four year grad. Family doesn’t really apply. I mean I call them my brothers, but they aren’t really. They are just good friends. I am against using words for superficial reasons and for me brothers is a good example of it. They are not my brothers, and not really like my brother, my brother and I have a bond that is unique and can not be replicated by initiation into a fraternity. Friends is another easy one, not only has the numbers of friends gained remarkably by joining the fraternity but also the number of quality friends. Friends that I wouldn’t have to think twice about calling at three o clock in the morning if I needed him. Friends that wouldn’t think twice about getting up in the middle of the night to help. How many people can truly say that they have twenty 3 AM friends. I feel lucky to know these fine people and to have them as friends. Career has really yet to apply, but my contacts with the CU football team and the NFL all come from the frat and if they do come through it will make a substantial impact on my career and personal mission. Personal growth is a big one and I think I will save it for tomorrow.
I reserved today’s entry to talk about the personal growth I have experienced as a result in being part of the fraternity. I think it is obvious to assume I would have experienced personal growth with or without the fraternity, but I have grown in ways that I can specifically attribute to my role as a Theta Xi.
For one, I learned the value of respect. In high school I acted as a leader in many social situations. Part of it was due to my in school personality. The kids at my school saw how easily scholastic success came to me and understood that I was smart. By the time I had graduated I was, as most people probably are, tired of my role. I was tired of being burdened with informal leadership and looked forward to a proactive approach. When I arrived at CU, I was always joking around. I was saw as unfit to be in charge of anything. While I knew that I was capable, intelligent and skilled I had failed to prove this to the guys in the fraternity. The lack of respect that I felt was very damaging as I grew as a member and as a leader. I have learned the importance of respect and how to act to accrue respect. By fulfilling promises, being polished, and being fair but firm I have gained the respect, not only of my fellow fraternity members, but also of my school project partners, my employers, my friends, and my family. As I begin to write this I realize what length of time it has taken me to express my personal growth. This may become a multi-part series.
The two other major personal growth contributions have been a greater diversity of my knowledge and my general leadership ability. A lot of people probably view frats as a place where 100 guys that think, act, and dress exactly alike get drunk and molest girls. This could not be further from the truth. The guys in my house have radically different opinions, hobbies, and interest. I have learned a great deal about topics that my friends and I from home know nothing about. From religions to guns, and sometimes religions about guns. Being surrounded, living with, eating with and socializing with over 100 guys during my four years at college has resulted in many meaningful and intellectual conversations. Instead of having two or three roommates to learn from, their background and knowledge, I have many.
I have grown immensely as a leader. Although I never became president or even vice-president I have served as a leader in many ways. As a leader to pass an amendment to our by-laws that I believe in or as house manager or as a leader of a particular activity. I learned how to deal with people. That experience has come in handy as the coach of a football team and more recently to get the house situation for next year settled, which it finally is. It will also certainly come in handy in the years to come as I become a family leader and a leader in the workforce. I think there is good reason why fraternity men make up a significantly out of proportion representation as leaders like U.S. Presidents and Fortune 500 CEO’s. The leadership experience that I have gained in college probably surpasses 95% of my colleagues.
Today I am going to speak of a situation that a friend faced and what I think of it. The presidents of all of the fraternities called for a suspension of all parties for two weeks. This comes about 3 days before our next party. This is especially disappointing because we have thrown parties with less frequency this year and had not had one for months. It is even more bothering because it was caused by reckless partying at other houses. While I understand the motives of the presidents to set an example by showing that unruly behavior will not be tolerated, the people that are affected are those that did nothing wrong. Probably no house that was offending the policies had a party planned within two weeks of the party they just threw. Only houses that had done nothing wrong were punished, houses like ours. My friend, the president of our house has compromising incentives in this situation. It is his duty to represent not only himself and his wants but those of all of the members of our house. Our president losses little by not having a party, only frustration. It has become common practice that the president does not drink and does not party with the other guests in the same fashion so he can be responsible and available if something bad happens. You can see now why he might not be so distraught at the loss of a party. However, he is our president so he can represent us as a whole. Did he fail to adequately address the position of his members. I was not at the meeting but I can imagine that the conflict in interest played a role in our party getting canceled. I think a reasonable argument could have been made to prevent the loss of our party. Either one of three things happened, one he failed to articulate a reasonable objection, the other presidents were unreasonable in response, or he did not represent his constituents and instead represented himself. I do not know which case is the truth but conflict of interest will always shade doubt on issues like this. Lesson learned: lead in a way that is as transparent as possible, so your motives and actions can be better understood by your followers.
What a great weekend. It was a great opportunity to share good times with friends, especially because my time with these friends is limited. It was essentially a 48 hour party capped with 11 hours of driving on either end. My favorite thing to do on the weekend was to ask people what I should see on my tour of Lubbock, TX. The answer, there is nothing to see in Lubbock. It really helped enforce one of the two greatest decisions in my life, attending CU. The other was joining Theta Xi. As a soon to be graduating senior, I can really appreciate all that I have gained from my fraternity. The areas of focus in my mission statement are good times, family, friends, career, and personal growth.
Good times is an easy one, between all of the awesome activities and parties I have lived an entire standard college experience of good times every year. When I mention the list of things that I did at the end of the year it literally matches that of a four year grad. Family doesn’t really apply. I mean I call them my brothers, but they aren’t really. They are just good friends. I am against using words for superficial reasons and for me brothers is a good example of it. They are not my brothers, and not really like my brother, my brother and I have a bond that is unique and can not be replicated by initiation into a fraternity. Friends is another easy one, not only has the numbers of friends gained remarkably by joining the fraternity but also the number of quality friends. Friends that I wouldn’t have to think twice about calling at three o clock in the morning if I needed him. Friends that wouldn’t think twice about getting up in the middle of the night to help. How many people can truly say that they have twenty 3 AM friends. I feel lucky to know these fine people and to have them as friends. Career has really yet to apply, but my contacts with the CU football team and the NFL all come from the frat and if they do come through it will make a substantial impact on my career and personal mission. Personal growth is a big one and I think I will save it for tomorrow.
I reserved today’s entry to talk about the personal growth I have experienced as a result in being part of the fraternity. I think it is obvious to assume I would have experienced personal growth with or without the fraternity, but I have grown in ways that I can specifically attribute to my role as a Theta Xi.
For one, I learned the value of respect. In high school I acted as a leader in many social situations. Part of it was due to my in school personality. The kids at my school saw how easily scholastic success came to me and understood that I was smart. By the time I had graduated I was, as most people probably are, tired of my role. I was tired of being burdened with informal leadership and looked forward to a proactive approach. When I arrived at CU, I was always joking around. I was saw as unfit to be in charge of anything. While I knew that I was capable, intelligent and skilled I had failed to prove this to the guys in the fraternity. The lack of respect that I felt was very damaging as I grew as a member and as a leader. I have learned the importance of respect and how to act to accrue respect. By fulfilling promises, being polished, and being fair but firm I have gained the respect, not only of my fellow fraternity members, but also of my school project partners, my employers, my friends, and my family. As I begin to write this I realize what length of time it has taken me to express my personal growth. This may become a multi-part series.
The two other major personal growth contributions have been a greater diversity of my knowledge and my general leadership ability. A lot of people probably view frats as a place where 100 guys that think, act, and dress exactly alike get drunk and molest girls. This could not be further from the truth. The guys in my house have radically different opinions, hobbies, and interest. I have learned a great deal about topics that my friends and I from home know nothing about. From religions to guns, and sometimes religions about guns. Being surrounded, living with, eating with and socializing with over 100 guys during my four years at college has resulted in many meaningful and intellectual conversations. Instead of having two or three roommates to learn from, their background and knowledge, I have many.
I have grown immensely as a leader. Although I never became president or even vice-president I have served as a leader in many ways. As a leader to pass an amendment to our by-laws that I believe in or as house manager or as a leader of a particular activity. I learned how to deal with people. That experience has come in handy as the coach of a football team and more recently to get the house situation for next year settled, which it finally is. It will also certainly come in handy in the years to come as I become a family leader and a leader in the workforce. I think there is good reason why fraternity men make up a significantly out of proportion representation as leaders like U.S. Presidents and Fortune 500 CEO’s. The leadership experience that I have gained in college probably surpasses 95% of my colleagues.
Today I am going to speak of a situation that a friend faced and what I think of it. The presidents of all of the fraternities called for a suspension of all parties for two weeks. This comes about 3 days before our next party. This is especially disappointing because we have thrown parties with less frequency this year and had not had one for months. It is even more bothering because it was caused by reckless partying at other houses. While I understand the motives of the presidents to set an example by showing that unruly behavior will not be tolerated, the people that are affected are those that did nothing wrong. Probably no house that was offending the policies had a party planned within two weeks of the party they just threw. Only houses that had done nothing wrong were punished, houses like ours. My friend, the president of our house has compromising incentives in this situation. It is his duty to represent not only himself and his wants but those of all of the members of our house. Our president losses little by not having a party, only frustration. It has become common practice that the president does not drink and does not party with the other guests in the same fashion so he can be responsible and available if something bad happens. You can see now why he might not be so distraught at the loss of a party. However, he is our president so he can represent us as a whole. Did he fail to adequately address the position of his members. I was not at the meeting but I can imagine that the conflict in interest played a role in our party getting canceled. I think a reasonable argument could have been made to prevent the loss of our party. Either one of three things happened, one he failed to articulate a reasonable objection, the other presidents were unreasonable in response, or he did not represent his constituents and instead represented himself. I do not know which case is the truth but conflict of interest will always shade doubt on issues like this. Lesson learned: lead in a way that is as transparent as possible, so your motives and actions can be better understood by your followers.
